Journal of a Russian Imperial Guard soldier #5

  ГАРФ 640 -1 -384 (Tatiana Z | Flickr)

Alexander Palace, Summer 1911

Made a long patrol today. There was nothing to report. Time seems irrelevant except for the fact that I am bored and these hours alone are endless. My colleagues are only interested in making sure that the man beside them is doing their duty. The daily roll calls and regular inspections of our bunks and uniforms has become monotonous. It is difficult for me to muster any enthusiasm for my regular duties here.

The truth is, I am missing the company of the tsar's children. They have been spending their summer in the Finnish skerries. I can see all of their faces, but somehow it is not enough. I find myself drawn to them in ways much stronger than my obligations to the military. They have truly enchanted me. Perhaps it is my own fault that I grew so close to them. I often remind myself that they are the children of the Emperor of All Russia, so I must be careful not to overstep my boundaries.

My unit is no longer required to escort the tsar and his family on their holiday trips. We only have to accompany them as far as the yacht or train, after which responsibility is handed over to the navy and cossacks. With the imperial family gone for weeks, my colleagues enjoyed lesser workloads at the palace. I only look forward to going to bed to pass the time whenever I'm off duty, or going home when I'm granted leave.

Marie sent me a postcard with a picture of her and her siblings on the obverse. Very kind of her. I will be sure to write to her should the opportunity arise. It may be forward of me, but what can it hurt? After all, she is my friend. Sometimes I even think of her as a sister.